On happiness

I watched this movie, one of those adapted from theatre kind of slow paced dialogue intensive movies, which was very interesting but unfortunately did not make the transition from my short to long term memory very well .There is only one portion of dialogue I actually remember. One of the main characters, I think it was Dame Judy Dench, remarks that she was happy once and if she had known that that short time would have been it for the rest of her life -her allotted time for happiness- she would have held on to it, as something precious, for as much as she could have. Firstly, I remember this specific part because when she delivered this line it was done with such poignant bitter-sweat beauty and truthfulness and, secondly, I remember it because I remember thinking that sometimes scriptwriters come up with total nonsense and rubbish. At that time I was the happiest I've ever been and could see no end to happiness. I remember saying that I had never been happier in my life, which is quite something to say. It was unfathomable,... impossible that I should feel any different. Then fate comes along of course and slaps you across the face into a rude awakening...I entered a part of life where I lost that euphoria of complete satisfaction. Not because of the love of my life or our wonderful toddler...those are beautiful constants in my life, and anchor me in times of despair but because of a growing dissatisfaction in what I'm doing in life. Those words from the forgotten movie drifted out at me and I realised that whoever wrote those few lines must have had some sort of life experience as reference. Luckily my experience hasn't been as extreme as the character in the film, the thought of the cruelty of complete happiness in place and profession and then just nothing else...not despair but just existence is a very scary idea. Heather has helped my evaluate things. At times by just listening to my complicated thought processes...thank you for being my rock love...and I've been trying to accomplish my dreams in the creative area...(note: one eyed kat is just a diversion...), and slowly I am finding a passion I had previously lost...In so many areas I'm happy, learning and growing...Dylan and Heather give me joy and make me essentially happy...they complete me, keep me growing and challenge me to new heights...I'm living the moment again and not dwelling on what has been...feels pretty damn fantastic actually...Gotta love life babe...its a fun journey with my soul mate and cool tod....and I am really thankful.

I don't know what the chinese says but I was thinking about happines and things when I looked up and saw this sign...made me laugh and resolve things...